12-24-2019, 04:35 PM
This is one of the saddest years that I've had to endure in regards to love and relationships. I got my heart ripped off in the summer. And even though it had happened before, this was the hit that finally got me on the ground. I couldn't stand up.
And the worse part is that I don't see a way out of this endless cycle of torture. I am slowly coming to terms with my curse – women do not want me and there's that. I will forever be alone. Most do not even want a second date with me let alone more.
And while I understand that the modern woman is sick to the bones, I cannot change the fact that the loneliness and the bleakness got the best of me.
The best part of the year was finishing the book A Desert in the Sky. Writing it was a rather painful experience in and of itself. I experienced huge liberation when it was done as if I was leaving all those stories behind me. I love how it turned out. I felt satisfied with the final result.
All my love pursuits have been honest and yet resulted in nothing but extended suffering. You can attribute my failure to the possession of an improper mindset. But I don't care. I am tired of constantly "mind-hacking" myself to come up with a new theory that produces more hope. It was about time for me to admit the obvious. Things are not going to end well.
And the worse part is that I don't see a way out of this endless cycle of torture. I am slowly coming to terms with my curse – women do not want me and there's that. I will forever be alone. Most do not even want a second date with me let alone more.
And while I understand that the modern woman is sick to the bones, I cannot change the fact that the loneliness and the bleakness got the best of me.
The best part of the year was finishing the book A Desert in the Sky. Writing it was a rather painful experience in and of itself. I experienced huge liberation when it was done as if I was leaving all those stories behind me. I love how it turned out. I felt satisfied with the final result.
All my love pursuits have been honest and yet resulted in nothing but extended suffering. You can attribute my failure to the possession of an improper mindset. But I don't care. I am tired of constantly "mind-hacking" myself to come up with a new theory that produces more hope. It was about time for me to admit the obvious. Things are not going to end well.