(04-09-2019, 06:09 PM)Plato Wrote: I have them big time no matter if I get called attractive our weather I get compliments I still feel un confident .
More to do with my traumatic experience at school and my family life . My dad was very aggressive man treated my mum like shit .
Tips to improve confidence growth
You need to work on these issues, most probably with a specialist, because the internet and self help books,plus advice from people around you can only do so much before eventually reaching a point where you will simply spin your wheels and never really solve the issue at all. But mark my words, if you dont trust yourself, why would anybody else do in the first place? Its not their business to trust you, they are already in fight with their own issues. Nobody likes a crybaby, or someone that comes and engulfs them with a huge number of problems. Believe me, most people do not really care what you do or think, which is why you should NOT care about what someone else is thinking about you (unless its a high value person to you)
Whatever experiences you may have had is irrelevant to the "NOW" or in other words the present. Its the present and the future that matters. The past is the past. Deal with it. It does not physically return, so the only way it can return is if you think about it - so stop thinking about it - problem solved.
As for your parents, i can understand how you feel, but since you are possibly an adult or close to adulthood its time to realize that "parents" is just a label word for 2 people who brought you up and cared about you. That does not mean they are always right , nor that they are good people just because they are your parents. They are still humans with flaws . Acknowledge that, and move on with your OWN life, not their life. After all, your mom is an adult and if your dad was as violent as you say she could divorce him and inform the police for domestic violence.
The last thing you want, is ruin your life. If you parents were bad, try becoming a better person than them and for your future kids. You have a lot to win and nothing to lose.