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Controlling Rage Around Women
#1
I'm going to be blunt. I despise women and tend to get very rageful when around them. Just the sound of their voices like the "Californian blonde chick" accent can make me a raging animal inside my head.

I have to go this unfortunate date/mingling event tonight and only doing it to get practice with talking to some new women at a place I've never been. However, I'm already getting paranoid and angry. Anticipating all the terrible things that can happen with women. Oh, and for context this is in NYC, a place where women have the highest standards ever and where competition is really fierce. I'm still in last year of undergrad without any prestigious job or social status and am competing against men who have careers in Wall Street so my odds are not in favor for me. 

How do you other guys control your anger so as to feel calm and confident "inside"? I haven't found any ways to do it. I can pretend to look calm and confident on the "outside", but it can't hide all the insecurities from women since they are blessed with that sixth sense of detecting men who are unstable, no matter what the men do to hide it.

I always worry I will get arrested one day when I get pissed by a woman who says or makes some gesture to disrespect me as a man. My therapist just teaches me meditation techniques and they only work maybe 25% of the time. I sometimes resort to calming drugs but then I get all spaced out at the bars/clubs and end up zombiefied in the corner on a couch somewhere. 

Dating sucks as all posters on here seem to realize.
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#2
Well Most my friends are women and I get on with them . I think women you are talking about are the annoying princess type. I stay away from them
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#3
When I am about to explode in rage at a female specimen, I storm out and get in my car. I then drive about aggressively with eminem on full wack. When I see a female walking along the side of the road, I wind the window down and give her a load of abuse before speeding off.

Always makes me feel better.
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#4
That is so patetic and the same time the only way for man, is really hard to be man now day when to be a pet for women is the norm
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#5
most women who says things is because they are insecure them self as in people who bully other people do the same . I like to say something funny back . but that to me is just people in general . I love women but obviously lot women have got bad behavior . like for men or women if they treat me like shit. ill say something back , our walk away you got respect yourself as well .
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#6
Man I don't know why I typed up such insane text. It's true that I have anger/resentment/hatred towards women, but I gotta keep my posts more formal in the future.

I was not thinking logically that day. Some days it seems my anger just makes me seem like a insecure deadbeat, which is partially true.

Well, I've chosen to do pretend mode confidence in the past with women. It's draining on mental resources though. I'm introverted by nature so I can only do pretend mode for small periods of time like a couple hours. I will act a bit more charming and smile/laugh even if it's not genuine. Some women find it natural and others probably sense it's not. Depends on the woman. Sometimes I use benzos to cheat since they relax me and make me more sociable. Don't do that anymore though as it's unhealthy and doesn't mix well with alcohol at bars where I mingle with most women. 

I've practiced quite a bit, but it's provided barely any benefits versus the costs of my internal resources. I had to court one female study partner for 6 months to have a one night stand. Ridiculous and inefficient. 


I generally have anti-social tendencies. Even everyday noises from people such as neighbors can make me pissed and want to physically hurt them.
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#7
(01-29-2019, 06:21 AM)Brett Wrote:
(01-29-2019, 01:34 AM)locutus24 Wrote: Man I don't know why I typed up such insane text. It's true that I have anger/resentment/hatred towards women, but I gotta keep my posts more formal in the future.

I was not thinking logically that day. Some days it seems my anger just makes me seem like a insecure deadbeat, which is partially true.

Well, I've chosen to do pretend mode confidence in the past with women. It's draining on mental resources though. I'm introverted by nature so I can only do pretend mode for small periods of time like a couple hours. I will act a bit more charming and smile/laugh even if it's not genuine. Some women find it natural and others probably sense it's not. Depends on the woman. Sometimes I use benzos to cheat since they relax me and make me more sociable. Don't do that anymore though as it's unhealthy and doesn't mix well with alcohol at bars where I mingle with most women. 

I've practiced quite a bit, but it's provided barely any benefits versus the costs of my internal resources. I had to court one female study partner for 6 months to have a one night stand. Ridiculous and inefficient. 


I generally have anti-social tendencies. Even everyday noises from people such as neighbors can make me pissed and want to physically hurt them.

Ive used anti-anxiety pills before. Not prescription drugs though. I found they provide a temporary solution and then faded. The root of the problem (the fear) always remains. Over time I just blunted the tip of the sword of my fear so to speak. 

My neightbours are super noisy. On a daily basis I have to deal with car idling, excessive revving, angle grinding, and dogs that won't shut up. 

I may as well be living in a industrial zone. I think they all add to my stress levels. Perhaps one day I will snap in a shopping mall at the teller for something trivial and they will have to escort me out with security Smile

Let me guess she was borderline average looking too? Women these days think they are special snowflakes (perhaps they always did, i'm not sure, atleast the narcissism wasn't around in the past because there wasn't social media).

I feel as if mingling with women in bars could be the single biggest waste of your (any mans) time. You are just throwing money away and brain cells. That same money men could use to take up hobbies such as painting, woodwork or even photography (not for instagram but personal enjoyment).

Yeah, a temporary solution. I still take them for home use to ease anxiety due to noise and to help me get to sleep, but not for social situations. 

That sucks about your neighbors. I grew up in a rural place with 5 acres of woods, but now in NY and it's been difficult to adjust to the common noises here. First floor apartment near receptionist desk and hear walkie talkie sounds from the maintenance guys throughout day and construction noise on side of windows lately. No sound proof on front door of apt. All I can do is adapt like walking out in the parks or use noise cancelling headphones. And I feel you there. I think I may snap too. Actually I sort of did and got in trouble with the housing people once, but it was a small incident. Called some maintenance guys drilling on my wall scum bags. 

She was by my standards 5 or 6/10. Yeah nothing physically special or personality-wise. I mean maybe I'm not high on the scale to most women either. It's hard to judge one's own appearance. I am lean and not fat though and 6'1 with some muscle, but nothing noticeable during winter. Not sure how my face appeals to women. The face is quite important I believe. Got plenty of rejections and even humiliations when I was a teenager by attractive and average women. Still get fair share of rejections from average women. 

NY... probably worst place to attempt dating. Women here have many options to choose from, though ironic since according to statistics twice as many women are single than men here. Actually makes sense since they are picky and just keep looking for some imaginary guy. At least that's what they say. I had this obnoxious and useless therapist who I quit long ago tell me this saying: "women are choosers" and "choice definitely is in their favor in the big cities." Obvious and great for them... any thing good to say on men? Nope! 

A little side story too on average women. I hung out with a couple women at a bar I met. One who was not that good looking as in the ugly-nerd chick look. She was bragging to the other woman about this guy on Tinder who she "couldn't believe was into her." I caught a glimpse of him in a suit with shades and looked kind of tall. My first thought was "well, this guy had no choice even if he's somewhat good looking." The other good looking women are so picky they don't even consider someone like him so he scales down to uglier women like her. Twisted! I actually just got up and left as it was pissing me off. 

Yeah, bar mingling seems wasteful for me as well. Last one was a Match event in NYC at a high scale bar and it was okay. Got one date after that and then she said we weren't a match, which I expected. 

YES, I agree that hobbies are more fulfilling and that some money should go to them. I play piano 2-5 hours each day. It keeps the negative thoughts on women at bay since it engages the mind. Personally piano is more fulfilling than BB. BB you are limited by things like bone structure and the inevitable diminishing returns due to testosterone, but piano skill can be developed until you are dead or deaf. True that some have more talent than others, but I know of some average pianists who practiced hard and could play soothing yet complex Chopin pieces. 

Hope you have a busy hobby that keeps your life somewhat enjoyable or meaningful.

Suffering with NO meaning is the worst of all fates in my opinion.
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#8
(01-30-2019, 11:35 AM)Brett Wrote:
(01-29-2019, 09:18 PM)locutus24 Wrote:
(01-29-2019, 06:21 AM)Brett Wrote:
(01-29-2019, 01:34 AM)locutus24 Wrote: Man I don't know why I typed up such insane text. It's true that I have anger/resentment/hatred towards women, but I gotta keep my posts more formal in the future.

I was not thinking logically that day. Some days it seems my anger just makes me seem like a insecure deadbeat, which is partially true.

Well, I've chosen to do pretend mode confidence in the past with women. It's draining on mental resources though. I'm introverted by nature so I can only do pretend mode for small periods of time like a couple hours. I will act a bit more charming and smile/laugh even if it's not genuine. Some women find it natural and others probably sense it's not. Depends on the woman. Sometimes I use benzos to cheat since they relax me and make me more sociable. Don't do that anymore though as it's unhealthy and doesn't mix well with alcohol at bars where I mingle with most women. 

I've practiced quite a bit, but it's provided barely any benefits versus the costs of my internal resources. I had to court one female study partner for 6 months to have a one night stand. Ridiculous and inefficient. 


I generally have anti-social tendencies. Even everyday noises from people such as neighbors can make me pissed and want to physically hurt them.

Ive used anti-anxiety pills before. Not prescription drugs though. I found they provide a temporary solution and then faded. The root of the problem (the fear) always remains. Over time I just blunted the tip of the sword of my fear so to speak. 

My neightbours are super noisy. On a daily basis I have to deal with car idling, excessive revving, angle grinding, and dogs that won't shut up. 

I may as well be living in a industrial zone. I think they all add to my stress levels. Perhaps one day I will snap in a shopping mall at the teller for something trivial and they will have to escort me out with security Smile

Let me guess she was borderline average looking too? Women these days think they are special snowflakes (perhaps they always did, i'm not sure, atleast the narcissism wasn't around in the past because there wasn't social media).

I feel as if mingling with women in bars could be the single biggest waste of your (any mans) time. You are just throwing money away and brain cells. That same money men could use to take up hobbies such as painting, woodwork or even photography (not for instagram but personal enjoyment).

Yeah, a temporary solution. I still take them for home use to ease anxiety due to noise and to help me get to sleep, but not for social situations. 

That sucks about your neighbors. I grew up in a rural place with 5 acres of woods, but now in NY and it's been difficult to adjust to the common noises here. First floor apartment near receptionist desk and hear walkie talkie sounds from the maintenance guys throughout day and construction noise on side of windows lately. No sound proof on front door of apt. All I can do is adapt like walking out in the parks or use noise cancelling headphones. And I feel you there. I think I may snap too. Actually I sort of did and got in trouble with the housing people once, but it was a small incident. Called some maintenance guys drilling on my wall scum bags. 

She was by my standards 5 or 6/10. Yeah nothing physically special or personality-wise. I mean maybe I'm not high on the scale to most women either. It's hard to judge one's own appearance. I am lean and not fat though and 6'1 with some muscle, but nothing noticeable during winter. Not sure how my face appeals to women. The face is quite important I believe. Got plenty of rejections and even humiliations when I was a teenager by attractive and average women. Still get fair share of rejections from average women. 

NY... probably worst place to attempt dating. Women here have many options to choose from, though ironic since according to statistics twice as many women are single than men here. Actually makes sense since they are picky and just keep looking for some imaginary guy. At least that's what they say. I had this obnoxious and useless therapist who I quit long ago tell me this saying: "women are choosers" and "choice definitely is in their favor in the big cities." Obvious and great for them... any thing good to say on men? Nope! 

A little side story too on average women. I hung out with a couple women at a bar I met. One who was not that good looking as in the ugly-nerd chick look. She was bragging to the other woman about this guy on Tinder who she "couldn't believe was into her." I caught a glimpse of him in a suit with shades and looked kind of tall. My first thought was "well, this guy had no choice even if he's somewhat good looking." The other good looking women are so picky they don't even consider someone like him so he scales down to uglier women like her. Twisted! I actually just got up and left as it was pissing me off. 

Yeah, bar mingling seems wasteful for me as well. Last one was a Match event in NYC at a high scale bar and it was okay. Got one date after that and then she said we weren't a match, which I expected. 

YES, I agree that hobbies are more fulfilling and that some money should go to them. I play piano 2-5 hours each day. It keeps the negative thoughts on women at bay since it engages the mind. Personally piano is more fulfilling than BB. BB you are limited by things like bone structure and the inevitable diminishing returns due to testosterone, but piano skill can be developed until you are dead or deaf. True that some have more talent than others, but I know of some average pianists who practiced hard and could play soothing yet complex Chopin pieces. 

Hope you have a busy hobby that keeps your life somewhat enjoyable or meaningful.

Suffering with NO meaning is the worst of all fates in my opinion.

It must be hard to go from living by the woods to living in the city. The adjustment must be quite drastic.

I wish I could live by the woods some day.

Keep up the piano, its a skill that nobody can ever take away from you once you have mastered it (within your genetic limit).

I need to find more hobbies besides just lifting weights. At the moment all I do is gym and work, with the occasional jog on the beach.

Same here, I have experienced some positive responses from woman in the real world. Two middle aged woman with kids have told me I am good looking, and I'm sure they had nothing to gain from telling me this. One said I was 'perfect' and the other said 'very hot' or something to that effect. But whenever I used Tinder I just felt borderline below average based on my poor success rate. Perhaps I just had bad photos, I'm not sure.

One thing I know is although most women have the exact same preferences when it comes to height, broad shoulders, aesthetic face etc. They tend to differ in what they prefer, such as long noses, eyebrow shape, cheek bone depth etc. Very few men have such perfect facial features to attract every female they look at.

I can only imagine that the girls in NY are very shallow and pretentious. If it makes you feel any better, in most western influenced countries the woman are like this. There are exceptions, but exceptions don't nullify the rule, they uphold it.
Yeah, it was hard at first. I'm a little more used to it though. Hardest part is the train that has to be used to get anywhere. Very stressful and anxiety inducing to be crammed together like sardines during rush hour or in winter time. 

Yeah, it's nice. My mom had us move about 3 times and it was always in areas with nature. We lived in Western Oregon which is known for it's nice scenery, forests, and rain. 

Totally right about piano. I don't think most of us have very many freedoms, but things like piano or the hobbies you mentioned are a form of freedom though it requires rigorous study and discipline to keep at it. You could try an instrument if you are curious. Electronic keyboards aren't too expensive or acoustic guitars. I tried guitar, but I couldn't get the hang of it. Piano different story. My fingers are long and slender so I have a good hand structure to play keys. I tried dancing but for the wrong reason; to impress women. Better to pick a hobby that you genuinely enjoy rather than to appease some group of people. I play piano just cause I enjoy the sound of me making music. It's a private/sacred hobby. 

Well, BB can be a good hobby for some. For me it's not really giving me fulfillment since my gains are natural. I'm a mix between ecto and meso so I struggle with upper body barbell lifts, though I'm much better at chin ups and dips. My point is I don't have a very impressive physique after 1 1/2 years of training. I can't speak for other people though. It's weird cause in my bedroom I have my power rack and barbell with weights stationed right behind my piano. I practice both in the same room and they are sort of like polar opposites, but complement one another in some strange way. One for the body and the other for the mind.  

I first tried Tinder about a 2 years ago for like 9 months. I occasionally got likes by some average to good looking women, but I did really stupid things with my openers. One woman was a guitar player and maybe some small-time musician in Brooklyn. Nice face and hair, but after my opener the like was gone. OKC I had better luck and had a few dates with decent looking college women. Still a struggle though. I sometimes would send mean messages which did get responses. It was partly an experiment and partly out of anger. 

My photos have been a mix baggage. I actually showed some to other women to get opinions. Some they said were okay and others looked like "show-off/desperate" pics which I then deleted. Pics that worked best for me were ones outside in the park with sunshine and my hair blowing in the wind. 

My hair was longer and the wind had my hair formed into the shape of one of those Dairy Queen ice cream cones. It looked quirky and I had this quirky smile of not caring as I was high at the time, and it actually led to increased views and likes. But I had to quit the dating app (Match) as it was expensive and I was financially limited in college at time. I think the "not caring attitude" works well for pics. 

Interesting on the idea of subtle preferences for nose length and the others. I have those same preferences as well. I like women with certain types of eye shapes, eye colors, noses, and cheek shapes too. There are women who would be generally considered hot, yet I would prefer another woman with more subtle features in the face. 

Most are, though I admit that not all were. I did meet some who were decent. As you know from that original post I am biased against women in general so I have distorted views, but sometimes I'm able to see in a more objective/clear light and will admit that not all are pretentious and shallow. 

It's better for in person dating, but for dating apps it's nearly impossible to get a response because of the population here and the fact that there are a huge amount of high status males (CEOs, Bankers, Model Photographers) that outclass me.
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#9
(12-08-2018, 05:18 PM)locutus24 Wrote: I'm going to be blunt. I despise women and tend to get very rageful when around them. Just the sound of their voices like the "Californian blonde chick" accent can make me a raging animal inside my head.

I have to go this unfortunate date/mingling event tonight and only doing it to get practice with talking to some new women at a place I've never been. However, I'm already getting paranoid and angry. Anticipating all the terrible things that can happen with women. Oh, and for context this is in NYC, a place where women have the highest standards ever and where competition is really fierce. I'm still in last year of undergrad without any prestigious job or social status and am competing against men who have careers in Wall Street so my odds are not in favor for me. 

How do you other guys control your anger so as to feel calm and confident "inside"? I haven't found any ways to do it. I can pretend to look calm and confident on the "outside", but it can't hide all the insecurities from women since they are blessed with that sixth sense of detecting men who are unstable, no matter what the men do to hide it.

I always worry I will get arrested one day when I get pissed by a woman who says or makes some gesture to disrespect me as a man. My therapist just teaches me meditation techniques and they only work maybe 25% of the time. I sometimes resort to calming drugs but then I get all spaced out at the bars/clubs and end up zombiefied in the corner on a couch somewhere. 

Dating sucks as all posters on here seem to realize.

I feel for you. I lived for 37 of my near 40 years of life in the dungeon known as NYC! I didn't live in Manhattan; I lived in one of the "outer boroughs" and worked there despite my move to the Island until a few months ago. Now I work and live out east. It took me over a year to mentally heal from the iron dungeon. 

I empathize with any sane person with normal desires that are not being met while living where you do, especially an intelligent college student like yourself. 

I've enjoyed some of our conversation so far in another thread. I did a lot of dating in the dungeon til I met my wife. 

This is going to sound overly simplistic, but I believe if--there are no guarantees--and once you find a normal woman with normal desires (which is goddamn hard to do in NYC), you will see how much of your rage dissipates. 

As stated elsewhere on this forum, I went though an incel phase. However, my incelism was mostly caused by depression which caused me to second guess myself, and in turn screw up opportunities with women who actually liked me! Once I got rid of that depression, I attracted enough women and went on many dates. But much of that was unpleasant because as you know, many women in NYC are married to a job, have ridiculous expectations, personality disorders, drug and alcohol problems, and are just damaged in some way or another! 

As per my therapist's advice, and meeting woman after woman who boasted of "crazy weeks" and "my crazy life"--you know, woman that are lawyers, doctors, executives, and married to jobs--I stopped bothering with such women, and narrowed my opportunities to women in caregiving or so-called "pink collar" positions, such as teaching, hairstyling, secretarial work, social work, or, dare I say, positions that don't warrant such damn ambition, like standing around in a retail store (not kidding). 

I think many men make matters worse for themselves because they feel they must conquer or sway women with ridiculous standards and high-driving positions, as if something is wrong with them if they can't. 

Out where I live I see many cute, and even pretty young women in the most ordinary positions: retail, buttering bagels, hair styling, secretarial work, and so on. And when I say young, I mean eighteen to 23 years old, which in sane times, were the ages in which women would be scoffed up and be ready to make babies--not an exaggeration (my grandma had my mom at 18). Thanks to the call for women to be careerists, capitalism that calls for the lowering of wages for everyone, social engineering of all sorts, cultural marxism, and the sexual revolution, that has been changed. But those forces do not stop men from pursuing more sedate and normal young women.
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#10
(02-12-2019, 03:15 AM)RedPillOverdose Wrote: I feel for you. I lived for 37 of my near 40 years of life in the dungeon known as NYC! I didn't live in Manhattan; I lived in one of the "outer boroughs" and worked there despite my move to the Island until a few months ago. Now I work and live out east. It took me over a year to mentally heal from the iron dungeon. 

I empathize with any sane person with normal desires that are not being met while living where you do, especially an intelligent college student like yourself. 

I've enjoyed some of our conversation so far in another thread. I did a lot of dating in the dungeon til I met my wife. 

This is going to sound overly simplistic, but I believe if--there are no guarantees--and once you find a normal woman with normal desires (which is goddamn hard to do in NYC), you will see how much of your rage dissipates. 

As stated elsewhere on this forum, I went though an incel phase. However, my incelism was mostly caused by depression which caused me to second guess myself, and in turn screw up opportunities with women who actually liked me! Once I got rid of that depression, I attracted enough women and went on many dates. But much of that was unpleasant because as you know, many women in NYC are married to a job, have ridiculous expectations, personality disorders, drug and alcohol problems, and are just damaged in some way or another! 

As per my therapist's advice, and meeting woman after woman who boasted of "crazy weeks" and "my crazy life"--you know, woman that are lawyers, doctors, executives, and married to jobs--I stopped bothering with such women, and narrowed my opportunities to women in caregiving or so-called "pink collar" positions, such as teaching, hairstyling, secretarial work, social work, or, dare I say, positions that don't warrant such damn ambition, like standing around in a retail store (not kidding). 

I think many men make matters worse for themselves because they feel they must conquer or sway women with ridiculous standards and high-driving positions, as if something is wrong with them if they can't. 

Out where I live I see many cute, and even pretty young women in the most ordinary positions: retail, buttering bagels, hair styling, secretarial work, and so on. And when I say young, I mean eighteen to 23 years old, which in sane times, were the ages in which women would be scoffed up and be ready to make babies--not an exaggeration (my grandma had my mom at 18). Thanks to the call for women to be careerists, capitalism that calls for the lowering of wages for everyone, social engineering of all sorts, cultural marxism, and the sexual revolution, that has been changed. But those forces do not stop men from pursuing more sedate and normal young women.
You definitely know what it's like here, probably way more than me as I've lived here about 3 years so far and hail from the NW where people are more friendly and low key. Move here was rough. I expected it to be before I came here, but it was worse than I expected. I at least thought that the university here which is reason I moved here would be less stressful and more welcoming than the city, but it's integrated into the cold atmosphere here so not really the case.

I hope the rage dissipates as you say. 6 years ago I was in a fairly longterm relationship and definitely wasn't as angry as back then. Makes sense what you say. I feel pretty sexist these days and some of my posts you may find as insidious. One of the most controversial posts I made was whether "some evil was necessary" to win at dating. I had some belief that sadistic sociopaths had some advantage over other men when it came to getting women or sex, but I don't have evidence so for now I'm not a total believer in what was mentioned there.

Been in therapy for a while and sometimes wonder if maybe my despair isn't the normal kind, but some kind of "discontent" and selfishness that is more common in sociopaths. Not every day will I have these selfish thought, but some days I just think I'm entitled to some women/sex without putting in effort. Very egotistical and selfish. Other days I'm more humble though. There were periods where I was going out often and meeting people which led to a few dates and temporary friendships. I'm more introverted and it can be draining to go out often, especially here. It's mostly the aura of the city where I meet people and the stressful train that discourage me.

I've met some of the career-based women at dating events. I was using Match for about 6 months who host physical meet ups for singles. Had mixed experiences with more  career oriented women were at events. Many were in late 20s and early 30s. Some were friendly, but many were what I'd call callous. I sometimes got glances by good looking women, but I wouldn't always try to talk to them as I thought maybe I'd misread cues and would foolishly approach someone not interested. But I got one date with a full-time working women. The date was enjoyable, but she didn't think we were a match a few days and said we could just be friends so I stopped talking/texting her. I expect many other women in careers will be similar. 

Yeah, the conquering attitude can backfire horribly. It makes me selfish and entitled if I go in with that attitude. I have tried to relaxed my way of attracting or meeting women recently such as at school clubs. 

One thing that I kind of regret is getting sucked into the Manosphere blogs. They are very similar to self-help books that don't offer solutions, but rather just give a man some kind of temporary endorphin rush when they make claims that with certain manipulation tactics then women can be made yours for sexual pleasure. I kept reading their material feeling I was enlightened, but reality was I was just getting addicted to their overly-misogynistic/hateful posts without even leaving my computer screen to socialize with women. In fact most of their posts aren't even about how to win women. They just post on their hatred of socialism (which I don't think is "completely bad"; another debate), feminism, and have more dialogue on politics. They almost seem like some offshoot of a political/cultural movement with bad intentions.  

They don't even seem to really believe in marriage or girlfriends. It's all about sex and what they call "game" which I don't think had a name before the modern age. Men a long time ago probably didn't refer to finding women as "game." Game connotes something similar to "hunting" women which probably isn't a good way to see the dating game. 

I'm gonna give some thought to your advice. I haven't had much experience with the pink-collar type women. For now I'm finishing 3 more semesters to get my degree and then afterwards a job. After that I will probably get back into dating.
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