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To date or not to date ?
#1
Well Hey We all know that looks play big role in dating game . I really what to know we’re I am attractive wise . I don’t what to go for people too high your too low. The thing I value in a girl is loyalty so I don’t mind dating lower to achieve that. So the question is how do you find your attractive level? ?
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#2
I would say it would depend on what you're after. I would only bother dating for relationship purposes. Dating to try and bed a hottie is likely to get you on the wrong side of a #metoo adventure these days.

Looks definitely matter but I think there are different types of attraction too. A shit load of money, power and status probably matter more than a six pack, but I don't believe people are 100% shallow. I know I would rather a girlfriend who I have fun with who I can talk to as opposed to a completely stunning girl who only talks about X-Factor and Facebook.

Finding people you share interests with and are physically attracted to is the key. For example, if you're really into running, then your passion for running and (hopefully) fit physique is likely to be attractive to girls who also like running. Likewise, you will hopefully be attracted to her for the same reason.

You are likely to attract what you are. Me and my ex wife both liked to get shit faced on booze, so at the beginning of the relationship we had a lot of fun doing that. That didn't work out very well long term though, I have to admit.
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#3
Thanks for the advice! I still think, I should know we’re I am attractive wise . been told I am 7/10 Guy . I am someone that really values love ?
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#4
Dating lower does not guarantee loyalty. Uglier girls are not more loyal than the pretty ones.

Otherwise, I understand the idea. If you are a league above, she should be reluctant to cheat...etc. The problem is that the modern woman has an overinflated ego. Some of the nastiest bitches are technically nothing special. They just abuse their power.

You can't determine your level of attractiveness down to the last point, but here are some guidelines:

1. If modern online dating works really well for you, you are part of the top tier men.
2. If modern dating gives you nothing but frustration, you could still be very attractive, just not on the top of the mountain.
3. Don't ask people you know to "rate you", they will lie. It's best if strangers do it while knowing that there will be no repercussion.

Honestly, however, don't waste time with that stuff.

You can never satisfy people.
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#5
Even strangers will lie in my opinion. Plus, it's subjective.

Another problem with online dating is how a lot of people use it to boost their ego. I downloaded Tinder a while back and got talking to a girl and I knew it wasn't going to work out simply because I wasn't that attracted to her physically. But I basically entertained myself flirting with her for a day. The next day I thought 'this isn't right to mess her about' and so stopped messaging her. She messaged me saying 'wow you're harsh' and I replied saying something like 'sorry, I wasn't being a dick I just don't want to mess you about blah blah blah'. She was cool about it then and we agreed to carry on chatting, but after a day or two it just stopped because it just got boring.

I would say that the experienced I just described is more common with women too. I've had it done to me. A girl seems interested then she goes cold and you're left thinking 'what the fuck is wrong with women?'. The truth is people chat to indulge in a bit of ego boosting and flattery or if they're bored and have nobody better to talk to. This sounds harsh but it's how human beings are. When things start to get a bit serious, people then get scared and just stop talking. This leads to frustration and hurt feelings if one person is interested in taking things further and the other is just after a bit ego boosting.

Probably 90% of 10/10 women on Tinder are there for the ego boost I bet. While guys can spend their evenings masturbating to porn and levelling up on Skyrim, girls find no better entertainment than getting positive reinforcement from guys on social media and dating apps. Imagine how good you'd feel about yourself if your inbox was full of messages that said "hey sexy" and wow you're hot."
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#6
(10-15-2018, 03:06 PM)Jonesy Wrote: Even strangers will lie in my opinion. Plus, it's subjective.

Another problem with online dating is how a lot of people use it to boost their ego. I downloaded Tinder a while back and got talking to a girl and I knew it wasn't going to work out simply because I wasn't that attracted to her physically. But I basically entertained myself flirting with her for a day. The next day I thought 'this isn't right to mess her about' and so stopped messaging her. She messaged me saying 'wow you're harsh' and I replied saying something like 'sorry, I wasn't being a dick I just don't want to mess you about blah blah blah'. She was cool about it then and we agreed to carry on chatting, but after a day or two it just stopped because it just got boring.

I would say that the experienced I just described is more common with women too. I've had it done to me. A girl seems interested then she goes cold and you're left thinking 'what the fuck is wrong with women?'. The truth is people chat to indulge in a bit of ego boosting and flattery or if they're bored and have nobody better to talk to. This sounds harsh but it's how human beings are. When things start to get a bit serious, people then get scared and just stop talking. This leads to frustration and hurt feelings if one person is interested in taking things further and the other is just after a bit ego boosting.

Probably 90% of 10/10 women on Tinder are there for the ego boost I bet. While guys can spend their evenings masturbating to porn and levelling up on Skyrim, girls find no better entertainment than getting positive reinforcement from guys on social media and dating apps. Imagine how good you'd feel about yourself if your inbox was full of messages that said "hey sexy" and wow you're hot."

What you did to that woman is what most females do to the average man on the app - small talk followed by the inevitable ghosting.

I agree that many women on Tinder are looking for that self-esteem boost. However, there are also those trying to secure a highly desirable man - he has to be good-looking, the proper height and part of the higher social echelon. All women on dating apps are "dating up" whereas the men are "dating down".

Most women have the same type. Hence why a few men bath in attention whereas the rest get little - the 80/20 law.
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#7
(10-16-2018, 01:30 PM)TruthSeeker Wrote: I agree that many women on Tinder are looking for that self-esteem boost. However, there are also those trying to secure a highly desirable man - he has to be good-looking, the proper height and part of the higher social echelon. All women on dating apps are "dating up" whereas the men are "dating down".

The bold part is a good view on the modern online dating world. I know a girl who is probably a 5 or 6/10. Certainly not ugly but a long way from the upper echelons of 10/10 women out there who can get ego boosts all day long. 

She was claiming she can not get a match on Tinder. I sat and watched her swipe left through about 100 guys, many of whom were clear 7 or 8/10 males, but she's obviously aiming for a 10/10 on there, and the 10/10 man can easily pick and choose from a selection of 7/10 women, but he isn't going to downgrade to 5/10 women, there's just no point. I'll bear in mind this girl has fucked some retards in her time (in REAL life), and has offered it to me on a plate before.

It's just a numbers game for a slightly above average looking man (6 or 7/10). I'm recently single so I've been using Tinder. From a couple of hundred matches (that may be several hundred swipes to get a match) I may have legitimately messaged 5 or 6  women where it looks like it's gone somewhere and that has led to 2 dates, 1 being successful. That gives you an idea of the numbers concerned. You almost certainly won't "upgrade" in your level if your a man seeking a woman on Tinder. In the same time period I have had sex with more girls by simply going out into various towns/cities.
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#8
I only have ever had relationships with quiet girls who have liked me first
They were fairly attractive and very loyal but all of them had some kind of mental disturbance: depression, or sometimes they would get jelous over the silliest things.

If you're into that just try to slowly approach quiet girls.
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#9
Wouldn't quantifying one's self worth be trapping yourself within the "system"? And by system I mean the one where you find the cheaters and beaters, potentially nasty partners that they themselves have been trapped in same system of "I can't find anyone who is loyal or on my level".

What if we were to break free form the confines of this type of "I'm this number out of ten, in terms of XYZ" thinking? Perhaps there is a more organic method of meeting that special someone. Perhaps that cute chick that shares the same hobby as you in your local rowing club, or the extra thicc cosplayer you clicked with at the anime convention, might be interested in having a low pressure date with you. Nothing spells chemistry better than having similar reagents (hobbies etc)

Maybe, for a different outcome, it's time to try a different method
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#10
(10-19-2018, 07:51 AM)wetdog Wrote: Wouldn't quantifying one's self worth be trapping yourself within the "system"? And by system I mean the one where you find the cheaters and beaters, potentially nasty partners that they themselves have been trapped in same system of "I can't find anyone who is loyal or on my level".

What if we were to break free form the confines of this type of "I'm this number out of ten, in terms of XYZ" thinking? Perhaps there is a more organic method of meeting that special someone. Perhaps that cute chick that shares the same hobby as you in your local rowing club, or the extra thicc cosplayer you clicked with at the anime convention, might be interested in having a low pressure date with you. Nothing spells chemistry better than having similar reagents (hobbies etc)

Maybe, for a different outcome, it's time to try a different method

I understand what you mean. But there are hard obstacles.

1. This world is heavily focused on the visual. It's all about looks. Social media intensified the focus on the external many times. 

I am sick and tired of rating people whatever/10 according to their appearance, but that attitude is like the computer - it's here to stay even if we don't like it. The higher they rate you, the better they treat you.

2. All women want the same type - tall, handsome, funny, rich. 

They don't care about your actions. If you donate one of your kidneys, you wouldn't impress them. They may share a post about you on social media to present themselves as virtuous, but you will not become more attractive to them. 

A criminal who looks good would still be more attractive to the vast majority than a martyr who has sacrificed his life for the world.

3. Hobbies are limited. 

Activities don't create attraction but an opportunity to meet women. Sharing the hobby of a woman does not make you more attractive to her. Besides, what are the hobbies of women? Shopping, social media, cats&dogs, yoga, gym? I have never had interest in a hobby frequented by women.

4. If they are in the system, you are there too.

You may choose to be different and ignore new stuff, but the crowd will not. It will follow the trend and affect you too. For example, you may decide not to participate in social media (a wise choice imo), but the world would still judge you for it.

Women have literally rejected me because I don't have a "proper FB profile". I will never make/create one because I don't want to be a slave to some digital idea of me, but I am still facing repercussions.

In short, you may choose not to participate in the dating system as it is, but since the rest of the population is playing the game, you will get burned too.
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